[HORN HONKS]
Then blink your lights. Get a waitress over here.
In broad daylight?
- Hey, Fonzie. - Hi.
It's his folks' car.
[LAUGHS]
Let's go inside and eat. I can't stand being insulted on an empty stomach.
- Oh, hey, Trudy, Betty. - Hi, fellas.
Hi.
Well, how was the funeral? Ha-ha-ha.
- How about a burger and a malt? - Uh...
Hey, girls. How about a ride home?
- Okay. - Sure.
- Hey, we could take you home. - Yeah.
RICHIE: We could give you a ride home.
- In that? - Thanks,
but it might not be going in our direction.
Yeah, we're going forward.
[ALL LAUGH]
[HORN HONKS]
This is a good, strong car. How do they think we got here?
Come on, Rich.
Who you thinking about taking to the sock hop?
Probably just my socks, unless I can find some wheels.
Why don't you just take your parents' car?
They won't let me use it since I tore the window out at the drive-in.
Always remember, before you pull out, take the speaker off.
I suppose we could just take the bus.
Sure. You ever try to tell a girl's mother your bus ran out of gas?
We gotta buy some wheels.
Hey, how much money you got?
All I have is $100 in my savings.
- Hey, we could go fifty-fifty. I got 75. - That's fifty-fifty?
You can keep the spare tyre at your house. How about it?
You think my father would let me touch my savings for a car?
Talk him into it. Use psychology.
Tell him if he doesn't let you, you won't eat for a day.
- I couldn't do that. - Why?
- I get a headache if I don't eat. - Oh, Rich.
Watch him, watch him. Look out, ref, he's pulling his hair.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER ON TV]
- Give him the elbow-- - Daddy.
Joanie, I'm so sorry, sweetheart,
but that other guy had a fistful of Gorgeous George's curls.
Howard, what happened?
Daddy dented my whole body.
Oh, Daddy didn't mean it, dear.
But you should know not to sit close to Daddy when wrestling is on.
I'm sorry, sweetheart.
Marion, this'll be over in one more fall.
Come and help me in the kitchen, dear, or you'll be the last fall.
- Dad. - Look out, look out,
he's rubbing soap in his eyes.
What's the matter with you, ref, are you blind?
Turn it off, will you, Richie?
Dad, there's something I'd like--
Those guys aren't athletes, they're actors.
The whole thing is phoney.
The only real person on that whole screen is Hatpin Mary.
Here, Dad.
[SIGHS]
What is it, Richie?
Well, Dad, I'm 17 and I think it's time that I learned responsibility.
You wanna work in the store?
No, I was thinking more along the lines of transportation.
- You wanna work on a train? - I wanna buy a car.
Oh, Richard, what do you want a car for?
For lots of things. For running errands for Mom.
Going necking.
I'm sure that's not what Richard wants the car for, Joanie.
Mom, Mom, Richie's gonna buy a car.
Tell me, where do you plan to get the money
to buy this rolling den of iniquity?
Oh, well, see, Potsie and I are gonna go in on it together.
[WHISPERS] We've got $175.
How much?
[IN NORMAL VOICE] A hundred and seventy-five dollars.
I always wanted a Cadillac in the family.
It would be nice to have a second car, Howard.
David and Ricky don't have cars. Beaver doesn't have a car.
Now, why should our son be any different?
I know it would be a big responsibility, but that's what you always say I need.
It'd help me mature, it'd help me learn how to take care of things.
You're gonna be depending on me someday.
Don't threaten me, Richard.
Howard, at least listen to what he has to say.
Me, listen?
[CHUCKLES]
When I was a kid, my mother used to tell me to listen to my father.
Now that I'm a father, my wife tells me to listen to my kids.
A lot of boys Richard's age have their own cars.
Let's just forget I ever even brought it up.
Now, look, Richard, you're old enough to make your own decisions.
All I can do is offer you advice.
I suggest that you finish high school and college,
get yourself a job,
then you'll have enough money to buy yourself a decent car.
That's my opinion. But you weigh the pros and the cons
and I'll go along with whatever you decide.
Terrific. I'm gonna call Potsie and tell him we can get the car.
I'm glad he's not rushing into this.
Well, Dad, isn't it a beaut?
- I'm speechless. - Pretty neat, huh, Mr. C.?
How much did the dealer pay you to take it off his hands?
We paid 175 for it.
Yeah, it was 225, but the guy let us have a break on it.
Yeah, he sure let you have it, all right.
How do you like the eagle?
Looks like he's waiting for a chance to jump off.
That was the best part of the deal.
The eagle probably cost as much as the car.
Oh, I believe that.
Tell me something, aren't these tyres a little thin?
Yeah, it'll be great for peeling out.
- Peeling out? - He means pulling out.
Safe and slow, just like you're always telling us.
They don't make them like this anymore.
- Oh, they stopped? - This is really a solid car.
[HORN HON KING CONTINUOUSLY]
[HONKING STOPS]
- Horn works. - I noticed it.
Wait till you hear the motor.
You mean to tell me there's something more to this car
than just its good looks?
Heh. Your dad has some sense of humour.
- Go on, Dad, get in and start it up. - Yeah, come on.
All right, all right.
[DOOR HANDLE RATTLES]
Is this a combination lock?
Oh, no, wait, wait. There you go.
[SIGHS]
[THUD]
HOWARD: Richie, don't you find it a little hard steering this way?
Hey, we have Nash seats. Isn't that great?
Talk about luck.
Oh.
- Howard. HOWARD: Is that you, Marion?
Why are you lying in the boys' car?
Well, I just thought it would be a nice change from sitting.
- It's a very interesting car. JOANIE: That's a Nash seat.
Yeah, that's very good, Joanie.
Yeah, I know all about that. That's called the make-out seat.
Dear, I'm sure that's not why those nice people at Nash invented that seat.
Maybe not, but that's what it's used for.
Well, it comes in very handy, uh-- if guests stay over.
- Richie got a phone call from a girl. - Who called?
Someone named Betty. She heard that you and Potsie got a car
and she wants you to meet her and someone named Trudy at Arnold's.
Our own wheels, Betty and Trudy, and a Nash seat.
Man, oh, man, we got it made in the shade.
- Let's go, Rich. Heh-heh. - Yeah.
If I could get a little help getting out?
- Oh, sure, Mr. C. - Thank you.
[POTSIE GRUNTS]
- Oh, here, let me hold the seat. - All right.
- How's that? - Back a little further.
Perfect. Heh.
Look, I'll hold it here and just run along the outside of the car.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
Here we go.
[ENGINE STARTS THEN BACKFIRES]
Come on.
[ENGINE CHUGGING LOUDLY]
[BOTH LAUGH]
- I think you got a hole in your muffler. - What?!
I said, I think you got a hole in your muffler.
Yeah, sounds great, doesn't it?
[ENGINE mes]
Did it have a warranty?
Did it leave a will?
- Wow, look at this car. - Super.
[HORN HONKS]
I'm telling you guys, this car is really smooth.
- Hey. - What do you say, Fonz?
[HONK HON KING]
[CHUCKLES] Hey.
See you guys later.
Hey, girls, want a hamburger?
You sure you can afford it after buying this?
Oh, well, we did drop a bundle on this baby.
- Six bills. - Really?
Listen, we were thinking about going to the sock hop on Saturday night,
if you girls would be interested in coming with us.
- Sure. - Great.
Yeah, we thought we'd dance a little, grab a bite,
then cruise up to the lake to watch the submarine races by the moonlight.
- Think we can trust them? - Hope not.
[ALL LAUGH]
Well, how would you guys like to drive us home?
Oh, we'd love to, but we didn't think we'd run into you here, so--
So we sort of made other arrangements. You understand.
Oh.
Look, we'll pick you up Saturday night, 7:30, okay?
- OKEY- - OKEY-
Bye.
Let me help.
- Bye-bye. - See you.
So long.
Six bills.
It's not how you play the game, it's whether you win or lose.
Heh-heh. Well, what do we do now?
We just sit here and play it cool till they close the joint,
then we push it back home.
[ENGINE STARTS, FALTERS]
I hope Fonzie can fix it.
He didn't exactly say he was gonna fix it.
He said he'd have a look at it.
Hey, I think there's a few things you should know
about getting anything started at the lake.
- Oh, come on, Potsie. - No, this is important.
Now, pretend you're Betty and I'm you.
Here's what you do.
Tell her you think her door should be locked for her own safety.
Then you real casually reach over and lock it.
[LOCK CLICKS]
Now, see where my arm is now?
Then you just put your arm around and...
RICHIE: Potsie. - Look, what happens, happens.
- Potsie, I got it. I got it. - You sure?
Oh, wow.
No, Fonzie--
Hi, Fonzie, we were just here.
- We were just looking at-- - Yeah. Right.
Checking to make sure all the numbers are there, that's all.
- What do you think? - It's probably just--
Fuel pump, you know--
- We're-- - Are we getting warm?
Wrench.
[POUNDING]
Screwdriver.
[TOOL CLATTERS]
Screwdriver.
[OBJECT SQUEAKS]
Leg.
- Leg? - Leg.
Okay.
Start it up, boys.
[ENGINE STARTS]
Hey, Fonz, you did it. Ha-ha!
Hands like a surgeon.
- Fonzie, listen, what do we owe you? - What do you got?
Oh. Anything we have's yours.
Are you sure you want that?
[SOFTLY] He wants that.
He took the best part of the car.
[ROCK 'N' ROLL MUSIC PLAYS OVER RADIO]
Boy, this thing's cost us a fortune.
I sure hope Betty and Trudy are worth it.
Are you kidding? Ralph Malph says they're a sure hickey.
I hope we don't have any trouble with the battery.
No sweat. The guy who sold it to me said it had 19 good starts in it.
Oh.
[BAND PLAYS ROCK 'N' ROLL MUSIC]
- Oh, we made it. Heh-heh. - I'm glad the dance is still on.
Yeah. I told them they could start it without me.
Good. Took us three hours to get here.
I hope the car will start again.
We only used up 17 of the 19 starts.
[SIGHS]
- Twelve in my driveway. - Come on, let's dance.
[CHUCKLES]
POTSIE: Oh.
Let's not waste any time. Come on, let's dance.
MAN: All right, cats and kittens, that's all the popping for tonight.
[MUSIC ENDS]
Now, don't forget your shoes, and drive carefully.
The life you save may be mine. Heh-heh-heh.
This is getting expensive.
Two dollars a dance.
[CHUCKLES]
Come on.
[I N DISTINCT CHAT-FER]
[LOVE SONG PLAYS ON RADIO]
We didn't get to dance, we hardly got to eat.
But we made it just in time for the submarine races.
[BOTH LAUGH]
Uh-- What do you like, strawberry or orange?
- Huh? - Strawberry or orange lipsticks.
- I just got two new flavours. - Heh. Strawberry.
Definitely strawberry. Orange makes my lips break out.
- Me too. Ha-ha! - Hey.
Oh, hey, look, your door's unlocked.
Look what you did. Look.
Hey, look, try and control yourself, huh, Rich?
I'm sorry. Sorry.
I'm sorry.
[SIGHS]
Gee, you know, I hear the Giants might move to San Francisco.
Oh.
[POTSIE AND TRUDY GIGGLE]
I want you to know that I respect you as a person.
For crying out loud, I feel like I'm in church.
Sorry, Trudy.
[GIGGLES]
RICHIE: Mmm.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
Mmm!
You really like kissing, huh?
No, it's the steering wheel. It's killing my hip.
Ow! What are you doing? You're killing my knees.
- Sorry. - Get back in the front seat.
My foot's falling asleep.
[HORN BLASTING CONTINUOUSLY]
- What are you honking the horn for? - I'm not, it's stuck.
BOY 1: Hey, is somebody having an air-raid drill?
BOY 2: Hey, Cunningham, can't you just say "Get out of the way"?
- Pull the wire. - I just did.
- You pulled the wrong one. BOY 3: Hey, fool, be cool.
BOY 4: Turn that horn off. BOY 1: We heard you. Shut it off!
[HONKING STOPS]
Got it.
[PHONE RINGS]
Mmm.
Hello?
Yes?
Who is it, Howard?
It's Betty somebody's father.
What?
Oh, excuse me. Betty Wilkens' father.
- Oh. - Yes?
Oh, well, just a minute.
Richie's date. He hasn't brought her home yet, and it's after midnight.
- I hope they're all right. - So does he.
Look, Mr. Wilkins, I wouldn't worry if I were you.
Richard's a very dependable young man and he's an excellent driver.
Ahem. And I'm sure he'll have your daughter home very soon.
Hmm. Thank you.
Goodbye.
[CLEARS THROAT]
Well, Howard, how can you sleep after that phone call?
Well, it's quite simple, Marion. First I close this eye,
- and then I close... - Howard, be serious.
Something could have happened. Maybe you should try to find them.
Marion, I'm not going out in the middle of the night looking for him.
He'll be all right.
You're a good father, Howard.
Why is it always us good fathers who never get any sleep?
Wonderful man.
[POP MUSIC PLAYING]
[HORN HONKS]
No, miss, I'm not having any-- Miss? I'm-- Uh--
[ENGINES ROARING]
[MUSIC CONTINUES]
[I N DISTINCT CHAT-FER]
- Excuse me, aren't you Fonzie? - Yeah.
- Aren't you Cunningham's father? - Yes.
- Can we talk? - Hey, Ralph.
Come here and hold up Cloris for a minute, will you?
- Hi, Mr. Cunningham. - Hi, Ralph.
FONZIE: Hey.
- So? - I'm looking for Richie and Potsie.
- Have you seen them? - I don't know.
- You don't know? - I know, but I don't know.
- You know what I mean? - No.
Oh. It's like an unwritten law.
Whenever a kid's old man comes looking,
you don't know where he is, whether you do or don't. Can you dig?
Look, Fonzie, I'm not looking for Richie in order to punish him.
It just so happens to be late,
and his mother and I are concerned about his safety.
You are?
- That's nice. - Well, thank you.
Now, I'd certainly appreciate it if you'd tell me where he is.
All right, pretend you're not talking to me. Turn around.
- What? - Turn around.
[SIGHS]
They're up at the lake watching the submarine races.
- What submarine races? - Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Will you sit down? I got my reputation to keep up.
What submarine races?
Uh-- I guess you would call it pitching woo.
Gotcha.
Thanks, Fonzie. Now, don't turn around till after I leave.
Whoa.
[HORN HONKS]
Miss, I didn't or-- Miss?
Oh. Okay, we got the lights, horn, windshield wiper and ignition wires.
- That should be it. - Okay.
[LOVE SONG PLAYS ON RADIO]
[GRUNTS]
[SIGHS]
Well, home, James.
[CAR DOOR CLOSES]
And take your time.
You gotta be out of your mind.
Well, at least everything works now.
[CHUCKLES]
[ENGINE FALTERS]
- Heh. - I think that was number 19.
To think I gave up watching Snooky Lanson
sing "Shrimps Boats Are A-Coming" for this.
[SIGHS]
Ah.
One of you has to steer while we push.
Tsk.
- Okay, Potsie, let's back it up. - Okay.
[BOTH GRUNTING]
- It's not-- - You got it in neutral?
Yeah.
- I think the tyres are stuck. - Well, let's try rocking it.
Okay.
Hey, there's your dad.
Oh, yeah. What a break. Maybe he can give us a push.
- Potsie. BE Y: Easy, easy.
- Hit the brake! - The car, Richie.
- Stop the car. - Back it up!
- Richie. Richie! - Potsie!
Well, will you get them out of there?
- Oh, I'm freezing. - Help, it's freezing. Oh, I'm so cold.
POTSIE: The lake water's freezing.
Do you wanna buy a car?
Oh, they're all right.
You see, Mr. Wilkens, I told you that Howard would find them.
Oh, my dear girls. Richard, what happened?
How do you do, Mr. Wilkens, I'm Howard Cunningham.
My husband.
Nice meeting you, Mr. Wilkens. My coat.
Don't you think you boys should say something?
Hey, girls, does this means it's off for tomorrow night?
Well, I think I'll go home and dry out my wallet.
- Bye. - See you.
- I'll make some hot chocolate. - Mmm.
- Richard... - I know, Dad.
You're gonna tell me that I just learned an expensive lesson
and that buying a junky old car like that was really stupid.
Well, now that you got that off my chest,
tell me something, how do I get my coat back?
Now, Richard, that's too bad about your car.
Well, it wasn't a total loss.
Fonzie took it off our hands for $25.
Hmm. That was very nice of him.
You know, there's a side to that boy Fonzie that nobody knows about.
Then he dried it out and sold it back to Otto's Auto Orphanage for 50.
Well, I hope you learned your lesson.
You know how it is. Potsie's my best friend, and, I don't know...
Yeah, I understand how it is with friends.
- Do you have a best friend, Daddy? - Sure. Your mother.
- Who's your best friend, Mom? - The milkman.
See, I can joke too.
[MARION GIGGLES]